Thursday, 7 June 2018

Wedding anxiety

OK, it's only 9 days away now. My wedding day is coming up far too quickly. When did it turn from being weeks away to just over a week away!? The nerves are totally kicking in now, the not sleeping properly, and then having wierd dreams once I am asleep, the staying up late checking I've not forgotten anything...
We finished honeymoon shopping a few days ago, my mum and I finished the last of our to do list jobs last week which was pinning the RSPB pin badges onto the name place cards and writing inside them what each guest has chosen to eat. I've had my final final dress fitting just yesterday in Bowness on Windermere at Julia Tasker Bridal (photo attached of The amazing Julia and I from my last fitting in her lovely shop added at the end of this post!)
Jason's collecting his and the guys hire suits at the weekend, I've got my final (part 3 of 3) hen do out in my home town of Peterborough.... It's all getting so very real now and I also failed to mention I keep checking the weather and consequently upsetting myself as I’m so worried it’ll rain when we’re meant to be having our outside ceremony. I (think) want nothing more than to be able to have our ceremony outside on their gazebo overlooking the lake and mountains but it's all depending on whether the rain holds off for me! So much sunshine for weeks and weeks leading up to it but apparently it’s all gonna change and go all grotty. But I guess I’ve got to be realistic, and also at the same time just hope that the forecast changes or the weather man is wrong! Or if it does rain, I’m still marrying my best friend in amazing settings and I’m sure my photographer Georgi Mabee will get the most incredible shots come rain or shine. I just wish I hadn’t had my heart set on that gazebo and this part wouldn’t be so nerve wrenching!
I've ordered some dairy free blondies and brownies to be delivered to my room for the morning of my wedding, I'm terrible at eating in the morning so I'm making sure I've got something to eat that won't make me feel poorly! Thank you to Babycakes bakery! I'll probably order up hash brown beans and toast too!
I also keep thinking wow this is it. (especially when I'm all tucked up in bed at night battling my insomnia) Your only time getting married have you included everything you wanted to? Is that really how you want your hair? Is there any little touches you've left out? Do you want to worry about the weather some more?

P.s I will be doing a blog post about my hen dos, (spa with my mum and Amsterdam with the girls was amazing!) the wedding and the honeymoon in July when I’m back. Then it’ll be onto moving!
Doesn’t Julia make me look tall!  She’s so cute and petite and a super lovely talented lady too! I’m gonna miss my dress fittings! 

Sunday, 1 April 2018

Wedding planning, work & tattoos

I'm am so surprised at how many of you have been reading my blogs!
Thank you!
I'm hoping to do another fashion related post soon - and seeing as my Autumn outfits blog was viewed most I'll definitely be doing a Spring version for you all... i have been distracted by wedding planning
.. I can't believe how soon it is that I'll be a bride! (Under 80 days away now!)
So far my mum & I have had so much fun looking & choosing we are in that stage of 'oh wow I think I could be a wedding planner', I keep getting told that it won't last and I'll be stressing soon...but I honestly don't think I will be! I've had another florist appointment recently and loved getting all the final details sorted and in my head, because I love the outdoors and flowers so much I've made sure it's a flower themed wedding! Focusing mainly on sweet peas & roses because my Grandad was very fond of growing both of these and the colour scheme being purple as it was my Nannys favourite colour 💜 (Did you see how quickly I got distracted there?😂)
 It's all coming together in a way I couldn't ever have imagined, and so much easier than I thought it would be and that's all down to my amazing Mum helping all the way, and of course my Dad for putting up with us both! I cannot wait to show Jason the things I've kept secret from him to surprise him with on the day, he's been involved in a lot of choices, but I knew I had to keep some things untold to reveal!
Last night my bridesmaids Sasha, Katie,  & flower girl Bonnie tried on their dresses and shoes for the first time and everyone's fit perfectly, I had to hold back tears! (I'm very emotional I've realsied and cry a lot at happy things 🙄😂)  I'll look forward to blogging all my wedding details in photo form for you guys to check out after the big day!
Once Bonnie had gone up to bed we all got together in front of sashas laptop and got our hen do to AMSTERDAM booked! 🙌🏻 I can't wait to go back there, especially with my girls!
So as you can tell I've been super busy with weddingy things as well as still running my photography business, and I got another three tattoos on my leg already this year - first one in Edinburgh, in February, I stayed with the awesome Joanne Baker ( for two nights, on the second day she tattooed a robin sat with some sweet peas at Semper the studio she works at and then took me for veggie/vegan lunch & cocktails 😋 Later in the month I headed off to Brighton Tattoo convention and got a Polaroid camera & the solar system tattooed on me by the amazing Jules boho from Austria ( and then finally got my gorgeous peacock butterfly from the beautiful Danielle Merricks at Inkden tattoo studio in Blackpool! (  So I've been all over the place again filling up my leg with gorgeous watercolour styles by three amazing ladies! You'll have to search Instagram for the photos 😉
I definitely love being busy, it keeps me going, it'd be far worse if I had nothing to do, this way round you feel fulfilled and then enjoy the breaks even more.
Photo of my wedding scrap book 📚 🙌🏻😍

Wednesday, 3 January 2018

The Holiday Season...

Every year I'm well aware of Christmas coming, I even advertise my Christmas mini photo shoots as early as September, yet I still am 'up to my eyeballs' in photos still to edit, presents to wrap, guilty feelings of not sending out enough cards to everyone I know and making last minute to do lists on December 20th!

^^ that's what I wrote on December 20th 2017... then the rest was a complete blur and now it's 00:38 January 4th 😑 Back to booking in more clients and more importantly wedding planning, though I kept having a play today and yesterday with the scrabble app I've recently got back into!  - I've had anxiety flood back into my body so I think it's been a bit of a distraction... I forgot how bad anxiety makes you feel, literally sick all the time, just not feeling right, aching all over, getting frustrated and upset when you don't want to be...
I had an amazing Christmas maybe it's just the January blues hitting me hard. I'm gonna keep being positive and hope it is anyway 💜

Thursday, 9 November 2017

Diary update...

11pm ish on a Thursday night, I've been editing photos from location shoots I did the other weekend all day, (well most of it) so I'm just enjoying a moment to myself making my way through a whole bowl of grapes. I decided if I've got time to stand here munching grapes and it's too late to reply to more emails or messages I've got time to do a little blog/diary post! 
At the moment I am loving Autumn,  but as always this time of year I have an influx of clients, it all starts with the Halloween sessions...then the autumn location shoots and then finally the Christmas minis all the way up until the second week of December as well as cake smashes and family shoots... so I am like on constant go at the moment. I'm not saying I'm always shooting or editing 24/7 (when I'm not sleeping) but because I want to always make sure I fit in all Roxys dog walks, which of course I have to take my camera with me for fun...then also doing my 'outfit' photos for Instagram most days, plus planning our wedding annnd the added temptation of autumns beauty outside, and fitting in catching up with all my friends, oh and Lush baths of course...I am really busy this time of year! But it's good to be busy, I love being busy, don't you agree? I still don't think I've ever got enough time for everything I want to do though!
I knew I'd write a few blog posts and leave it a little while (I'm guessing it's been about a month!?) before doing another, but I have been thinking about it a lot and have even made a little list of the things I'd like to cover soon...
I've also become obsessed with the chunky monkey almond ice cream by Ben &Jerrys, it's  so good to absentmindedly eat whilst editing or replying to emails. After blogging here about the peanut butter cookie Dairy free Ben&Jerrys I ended up finding the other two flavours in Tescos and i love the fudge one as well, but there's just something about the walnuts, the (not too strong) banana flavoured 'ice cream' and dark chocolate chunk pieces that make it so tasty! 

I'm hoping to do a little autumn winter clothes blog soon...I've got an order to make on NewLook and TopShop and then I think I'm set... though have you seen SkinnyDips new faux fur collection or   Irregular Choice's scarves and pillows? I am also really looking forward to Blackmilks Christmas release! I love to get one classic Christmassy print in something like a toastie dress or leggings and then get those staple pieces in maybe mulled wine red velvet or Forrest green velvet...
Which reminds me I got obsessed with looking at some velvet cushions in The Range at the weekend, but I wasn't in there to buy cushions so I stopped myself! (I was actually buying more photography props for my studio!)
That's me getting side tracked with clothes and shopping for the home! 

Right I'm going to publish this now incase I forget in the morning but in the morning I'll try to remember to do a little spell check! So my apologies if I've typed something wrong before I've removed this here at the bottom! 
Night ✨

Sunday, 15 October 2017

New Vegan Ben & Jerrys

Thank you Tesco! I couldn't find this new wonder anywhere, and just as I felt like I was getting even more behind the times I stumbled across the last pot of Peanut butter & cookies DAIRY FREE /VEGAN new BEN & JERRYS in Tescos normal ice cream section (so if you've been looking for it in the freefrom frozen section it might be why you've missed it)..opening the freezer door with one hand and grabbing the small tub of freezing cold almond paste (they've magically turned into icecream) I clocked the price... £5.50 for this tub, it better be good...
it was worth it though, and even though I'm not a great fan of peanut butter, the squidgy Oreo esque cookies that lay within the nutty ice cream made it a true delight 😋

I cannot wait to try the other two flavours I've heard are out!

Click here to see my Instagram post Ben & Jerrys Dairy Free  💚

Autumn outfits

I LOVE autumn...nearly as much as I love Spring. I think it's just that Spring is a more welcome thing after a long cold Winter, whereas we are never quite ready for Summer to end and turn into Autumn...

I do love getting cosy in autum outfits though! So far I've been loving TopShops jumpers perfect with velvet skirts and River Island & New Looks cosy oversized knits perfect with leggings or skinny jeans... (but I don't own a pair of jeans at the moment so a pair of leggings from my extensive BlackMilkclothing collection will do just fine!)

The Jumper pictured is from TopShop, size 8 & was £22. I love the gold button detail on the sleeves, the neck is a funnel neck which along with the cosy knit material it keeps you really warm! It's slim fitting so great to tuck into a skirt instead of faffing around with bodysuits.
My skirt is by BlackMilk Clothing and is a velvet pocket skater skirt, also super soft & warm!
Today I'm wearing this jumper again paired with another leopard print skirt by BlackMilk, but this time the skirt is is pocketless, but what it lacks in pockets it makes up in matierial as it is perfect for swishing & twirling!

I also picked up this coat from NewLook this year, along with another velvet dress, I love wearing black with a bit of tartan thrown in there as you can see! Scarf from Riger Island, Tartan dress by BlackMilk Clothing (sorry I really should sort out my links!) & belt by Fox&Owl who should still have a shop on Etsy run by an amazing couple from America! Third pic is a BlackMilk Clothing skirt with my BAM Clothing tee tucked in and a cute green hat I found in TK Maxx. Finally in the last pic I've got an American apparel crop over a green tartan dress and that's also from (you've guessed it) BlackMilk Clothing! So these were my favourite pieces this Autumn, and probably will be next autumn too! As well as my tartan leggings and red velvet leggings too! 
Gotta love a warm colour scheme in Autumn 🍂 

Saturday, 14 October 2017

Why start blogging?

Thinking about why I started this account up in 2010 and never did anything with it... everyone had/has a blog, why do I need one? I think it was probably the thing everyone did at uni and I didn't want to be like everyone else, I thought too much back then, considered far too much and didn't live in the moment. If I tried to be like everyone else but then failed, that would be far worse than being myself, I could do me, I just didn't trust anyone enough to see the real me. Too many nasty people around my GCSE years... It's so strange to think I used to worry so much it's like it's all just fading away from me now (finally!)... lifting me out of its evil grasp of that sick in your stomach, or heart beating too fast - suddenly stuck in your throat feeling... I can very slightly almost make my face start to go cold & pale at the thought of it - a panic attack for no reason, deciding I am hideous & I cannot leave the house - that's all going away now, I'm learning to LOVE me, and quite a lot too! It's an amazing feeling and it is still a daily battle with my anxiety, worrying about things that could go wrong so often, but I'm stronger than it now and have the power to be in control of it.
Which is probably why I've finally decided to do the blog thing. I'm confident as me. I thought I was sure before, but didn't want to jinx it. Now I don't even believe in jinxing something 😉
P.S i will get into some less intense causal blog stuff soon 💜🌌